Saturday, August 02, 2008

An encounter with a five tonner

Dear all

While returning from phulbani's forest areas yesterday, i had a strange experience.

Kindly discount the element of drama that i have put in to generate interest.

It was near about 6 pm in the evening and i was sitting in the pick up truck with a fellow employee and driver. Disappointed at the poor show in the neem procurement campaign i was clicking my way through the forest's bountiful natural beauty with the receding sunrays filtering through the sal trees.

I knew we had to get fast out of the areas as man turned into wild terrorists (read naxalites) might be lying in wait anywhere.at one turn all three of us were taken aback by the sudden turn of events in front of us that was least expected. From the hill side were descending a herd of 10-15 elephants about 100 metres away from us as the lad like driver brought the empty vehicle to a silent halt.Having noticed our presence the herd hurried on to the slope. I desperately tried to get out but both the driver and the staff (saumya) holding me firmly lest i get down.

No sir!! they exclaimed. They are very dangerous animals.

Dont u dare get down. they can toss this vehicle around if they want.dejected and angry i asked them to move on after the herd had left but made them halt about 300 metres from the site near an old temple. the sadhu came out and instantly i was near him bombarding him with questions. kyon baba yeh hathi marta hai kya???are nahin saab, paas main baccha ho to marta hai nahin to kuch nahin karta.haathi se bachna kaise chahiya?? i asked. Haathi pahad par aaram se chad jata hai lekin uska sir bhari hota hai isliye utar nahin pata hai.to phir to yahan kahin bhag hi nahin sakte kyonki yahan to poora pahad hi pahad hai. I joked little knowing what fate had in store for me 15 minutes later.Angrily i turned to the staff. dekha tum bewkufon ki wajah se mera photo reh gaya. haathi shakahari aur peaceful janwar hai samjhe.!!!

The staff were left speechless as i retraced my steps to see if i can click the footprints in the mud.I was more focussed towards the ground now as frustration had made me mad with rage at these ignorat fools. jindagi main pehli baar itne sare haathi wild main ek sath dekhe the :(Having gone just 100 metres (enough to elude the sight of the two some group) when to my utter surprise i saw a group of 4 more elephants majestically following the footsteps of the earlier group. Thera was a big female elephant and a smaller girl elephant accompanied by two small kids.apparently they had noticed that they were being watched as they started hurrying.I took out the camera and horror of horror the drained pirated batteries brought the camera to a halt.With shivering hands i brought out the two spare batteries (which were almost drained as well) and tried to load them into the camera. This proved to be a mistake as the bigger famle of the lot now felt a bit insecure as she stopped to turn its head towards me.Million Theories of fear,fight and flight raced through my mind as the 5 tonner beast stood there looking at me while i started moving back while facing it. Though it was far enough for me too zoom my camera but my jittery hands and low light gave a very poor result of the first two shots.Ere i could turn the flash on the elephant moved a bit further down to hide itself into the thick bamboo thicket and let out a trumpet sound enough to alarm the two people i had left behind.

SIRRRRRR age mat jaiyya.

I moved backwards towards them and put my finger to my mouth wildly before the animal gets more alarmed and starts on the dreaded pursuit that makes it one of the most dangerous animals on earth in that moment.Seeing me moving back towards to more people all of them also moved hurriedly into the dense jungle.I gulped the saliva down my throat and returned with a pale face towards the waiting two boys.

Sirrrrrrrrrrr aap hathi ke samne khade the???

aap bach gaye bal bal.The pujari of the temple added his cool remark... kismat wale ho bhaiyya.I agreed.But a deep piercing thought got left somewhere in my heart. Why so much insecurity in such a big animal.The answers was not far. The man animal conflict i was told was at peak in this area as an NGO i met made me recount the destructive habits of elephants in search of food in villagers where my classmates were posted for fieldwork.

(please discount the emotions they are for the first time reader)

Regards

Tinooooooooooooooooooooo

Tuesday, June 03, 2008

mathemagic kam aur mathepacchi jaada

Adaraniya mama saheb gan(log)

Meri dastan bahut hi karun hai :) mathemagic kam aur mathepacchi jaada hui hai::)

Please note that all the rubbish that is written underneath is a satire and am not at all serious in any part of the paragraph here. Also take it with a bucketful of salt.

Somehow i scraped through my 10th board exams vowing never to touch MATHEMATICS ever. 11th and 12th standard presented me with PHYSICS (which is applied mathematics). Both the years, I managed only passing marks (though had distinctions ((above 80%) in all other subjects).
I decided i will not touch any quantitative career fields bhale hi bhukhon aur berozgar hi kyon na rehna pade. BSC pharmaceuticals brought PHYSICAL CHEMISTRY which i could never understand and had to cram up everything only to forget them the next day.
Quitting BSc,I joined BMS and immediately confronted with BUSINESS MATHEMATICS. unnecessarily feeling relieved at passing first year, i had to surmount STATISTICS AND ECONOMETRICS in second year. All such subjects took 60 % of my study time with 20 % output belying pareto's optimality.
So i decided to move onto rural management and immediately realised that i have landed up from the ditch into the well. QUANTITATIVE TECHINIQUES, FINANCIAL MANAGEMENT, MANAGEMENT ACCOUNTING, MARKET RESEARCH AND IT INFRASTRUCTURE MANAGEMENT. Somehow could not be complete without number crunching.
so i decided to join NGO instead of banks to avoid any number crunching.
Lo and behold, i am presented with CIVIL ENGINEERING DESIGNS, FOREST MENSURATIONS while working.
So i run away to some decent farmer's organisation and get stuck with farmer incentives and bank accounts and subsidies and what not.
I think corporates are better manned with professionals so land up with some crooks from IIMA and Malaysia who do a lot of contract farming and STATISTICAL EXTRAPOLATIONS of production figures for their malaysia based plant and end up producing nothin from those contract lands.

I return back and am immediately ploughed into BUDGET CALCULATIONS and COST-BENFIT ANALYSIS ratios for projects. PERTS AND CPMs are all proving useless here as tribals are illiterate and more fond of drinking mahua then crunching COLLECTION STATISTICS OR COSTING. :)
To add insult to injury now am supposed to do TREND ANALYSIS AND CROSS GEOGRAPHICAL ANALYSIS OF common property resources (read pastures and forest lands) and NET SOWN AREAS to come up with recommendations to a fellow who is more closer to a buffalow in his behaviour (read raghuvansh prasad singh - a fotocopy of lalu yadav)
Surprisingly he is a PHD in mathematics himself (Source of information - Dada ji) - (no offence meant for anybody)


Hope u enjoyed the satire and realise how much i love mathematics

Tinooooooooooooooooooooo

Thursday, April 17, 2008

Krazzy Happy Bud-day

Dear All
At popular requests and dada's nirdesh here is a minute by minute lekha jokha of my happy Budday
Starting off at 9.30 from Udaipur, sleep deserted me till 12.30 when mom's fon rang!!! I had to wake up at 2.35 at Kota. Last time round, the physical trauma of 3 trips between Udaipur and Indore had left me feeling like the hunch back of notre dame.
I woke up 2.15 to alight at the kota junction at 2.40 to fulfill my residual quota of sleep. Till 3.20 I was looking for a place to do that. First class waiting room was stinking like anything.
So I decided to sleep on a bench. Ere 15 minutes had passed when a man with 2 boys and 3 girls and one woman came and demanded. Hum bhi baithenge yahaan pe!!!.
Kyon is duniyan main ye hi akeli kursi bachi hai kya??
Nahin hum yahin baithenge!!
To theek hai phir aap hi baith jao!! I commanded sneering at those semdoo kids and marched off to the stinking first AC waiting room.
I slumped onto a vacant chair at 3.45 putting the alarm at 4.30 so as to catch the 4.40 train that departs at 4.50.
I dreamt of papa offering me pohas and kheer poodi before my hands mechanically killed off the snooze button. My delirious eyes opened at 5. Aur main badhawas sa bahar bhaga. The happy family was still sitting on the bench and the kids were looking at me with fear in their eyes.
Who Indore wali train gayi kya?? I demanded from one of them.
Another man raised a finger that pointed towards the brand new electronic watch. I heaved a sign of relief at the kindness of Indian Railways as the train was running full one hour late!!!!!
I slept Till 12.30 noon that day attending fon calls every half an hour before they got disconnected by the cruel Air-tell.
At 1.30 after noon when I reached home following were the Birthday celebrations that I carried out in continous succession. Definition of lunch and breakfast was changed now…
1 glass tarbooz ka rass

Pao bhar ¼ Cake (sent by kind kanwar saab)
One full plate of indori phariyali khichdi (waise bhi mera fast to ab slow pad chuka tha)
Aloo ki Sabjee, Poodiyan, Dal Chawal (gujrati thali ki takkar ka full meal)
Pooran Ki Poli (with 3 spoons of Ghee)
Besan ki mithaiyan (3-4 piece)
1 glass angoor ka rass
Snacks at Rajmohalla
Neebu ka Sharbat
Having gone completely Crazzy eating so much within 2 hours we decided to watch Krazzy four. So mom and me marched off to Rajmohalla to become one of the 20 odd Krazzy people sitting and suffering through that foolish movie. This movie changed the way we see outside world because it expanded the definition of Krazeee to include quite a few known faces J
Dinner was logically completed with Bacha hua Pooran Poli from the noon feast!!!
This is how I became 28 years old just two years away from getting on the wrong side.

Sunday, January 20, 2008

Tyre Tube Baby

Tyre Tube Baby
It was already past eight at night and I scarcely was able to walk partly because of the dark and partly because of the fatigue both mental and physical.
The mental fatigue was a resultant of human emotions and fears brought about by the multiple risk factors that I had overcome just few minutes ago.
Ghosts of two years came to haunt me as I walked away from the banks of the huge water body towards the jeep. Two years ago I was walking on the same hill that I had just descended from having covered about 18 km on foot walking round the dam waters from the opposite site of mundawli. Seeing animals grazing and making merry on the medicinal plants that I had just got planted made by blood boil and I started pushing animals out and pelted stones at them like a village brat. Tribals families marooned on this side of the water came out to watch the spectacle. A sophisticated urban lad running after animals on a hill surrounded by water from three sides!!! The villagers who mustered courage came to hear a blast of threats before they proceeded to the plantation site. After all I had walked all this way not to see breakup of community cohesion and unity in the form of intrusion on community managed lands by a few mean and selfish individuals who were more interested in grabbing common lands of the landless !!
The report of the consultant (incidentally 12 years my senior from IRMA and 10 years my predecessor in Seva Mandir) who had given a graphic description of the problems was still fresh in my mind.
"Status of Joint Forest Management sites as of May’06: During the last monsoon after fresh grass sprouted at the 50 ha Talai I JFM (Joint Forest Management) site, damage was caused to the plantation of the community by grazing animals and a small fire. Grass was also stolen from the area. One farmer had encroached on some land close to the Talai II JFM area during the monsoon to grow mustard. This was proving to be a grazing hazard for the plantation. Moreover, grazing was also becoming a major issue of concern for the residents of Palan Pipli phala, where the Talai II site is located, because of a shortage of grazing land in the immediate vicinity. A significant amount of the protected forest land in this site got submerged under the Mansi-Vakal dam water because of which the passage for cattle from this phala to the forest had been cut off. Moreover, the site became inaccessible from three sides, due to submergence in 15-20 feet of the dam water, and only the side adjoining the neighboring village of Mundawali was open for entrance to the plantation. Therefore, the distance that one had to cover to reach the site became a major hurdle in monitoring the site."
The Seva Mandir staff agreed to procure medicinal plants from outside nurseries in time for the rains and the issue of labour allocation was also resolved with the help of Jeevaba, one of the leaders in the village. 16,000 saplings were planted in 2005. However, the intra-village feud came to such a stalemate, that villagers let their cattle go astray on both the JFM sites and almost 4,000 of the new saplings planted were destroyed.
"The aftermath of the Mansi-Vakal Dam: Following the construction of a dam on the Mansi-Vakal rivers and the subsequent release of water in 2005, a part of Talai village has been inundated by the river waters. Consequently a significant number of villagers have lost their cultivable land, common lands have submerged as a result of which not only grazing lands have been lost but also access roads have disappeared. Villagers, including women and children, use a raft made with tyres to cross the waterway to move from one side of the village to the other. This can be quite risky at times."
Today I had already walked approximately the same distance although at 45 degree angle on another hill and another site in the same village before coming to have a look at this one as well. The previous one had left much to be desired and I knew people concerned for the environment and tribals would accept defeat if these models don’t work out.
Having had a 8 month hiatus for Seva Mandir in the corporate sector, I was all the more determined to make it work.
The driver pointed out that it was already 5.30 and twilight when I proceeded to the second site for inspection. I was in no mood to return without seeing it.
Mind wanted to move but the limbs were almost numb with fatigue after a climb and descent of about 6 km in the noon.
My destination was the hill visible just 300-400 metres away but that I had visited two years ago walking all those unending 18 kms from the posterior side linked to the land.
Suddenly it struck me that I too could take the abovementioned risk of traveling/floating on water and thus save time and labor. I proceeded to persuade my companions who unfortunately were all non-swimmers. Not that I too am a champion having already survived almost near death experiences in the swimming pool and village ponds !!
I asked the lady who runs our child care centres to arrange for the tyre tubes for us. She hailed somebody called baloo from the other side who was supposedly a good rower of these tyres across the water.
Four tyres were arranged in a jiffy and to make good seating arrangements, mats of bamboo were placed over them. With many prerepaired puncture holes, these tubes were definitely not visually assuring ones. To have them floating over 100 feet deep ice-cold water was definitely disturbing. The fact that this was one of the largest water bodies in the area with a huge expanse made the danger of going astray a real possibility.
We were asked to sit on each of the tyres and join hands so as to make a train of tyres. I definitely enjoyed this sitting arrangements till somebody pushed the train onto the water. Baloo started rowing with palm leaves as makeshift rowing equipment. Just to do some time pass I asked him about the hazards that they face while undertaking this spectacle.
"Saheb hum to roz hi ate jate hain, raat ke 2 baje bhi" he boasted.
"To tum aaj tak gire nahin"?? I asked
"Gire hain na bahut baar". (yes many times), daru pee ke chalate hain to girte hi hain. (If we drink and then row then one does loose balance)
Sights of completely submerged coconut/date palm trees in the water with just their top leaves visible gave me a fair idea of the depth of water in many places. Just a meager touch of any of these leaves was enough to puncture all these tyres and take us to the roots of these trees.
The train of tyres edged forward at a snails pace. It took it a fair amount of half and hour to reach the other side and the time was already 6.15.
Happy at the uneventful passage I hurried up the hill. In the last rays of sun I had a glimpse of the now barren plantation site with the empty pits telling a sorry story. But a few tall adusa and eucalyptus trees seemed to have survived the onslaught and were testimony to the fact that proximity to water can turn a dryland into a fertile heaven if given proper treatment.
Having resolved to return with more people to talk out the issue, I hurried downstairs having shot a few snaps with those last pillars remaining. The 3 other people accompanying me were only too happy to return back as it was already 6.45 not knowing what was waiting for them.
When we returned to the bank, we had plans of returning back as quickly as we had come but alas some more adventure was in store for the day.
There were no tyres or bamboo mats where we had left them. Some enquiries told us that the tribal people who live on this side of water do not venture out this late so they have hidden them away.
We shouted out for out benefactor but he too seemed to have vanished. The lady paraworker on the other side of the water was now getting worried and she too used her vocal chords.
Last rays of sun had now gone and it was now getting pitch dark. Listening to our pleas the person returned but this time with deflated tyres that he managed to borrow from other people. Given the time constraint, one possibility was to wait on this side in some household for the night but the driver and other people had no idea what we were upto.
My thoughts were disturbed by the sounds of air as baloo proceeded to pump in some air using his lungs as a pump. Same rigamarole was repeated and we decided to waste not a single minute now and boarded the new train of tyres.
That it was 7.30 pm at night made matters a bit more difficult for baloo as well aw he started rowing. My words of solace for my friends anuj and fatehlal were now working to irritate them as they now were really afraid for their lives in the dark. As the adage goes, some degree of anxiety is good but I thought of no good when you don’t know how to swim and only a bamboo mat separates you from a standing river.
The darkness was pierced by the rowing sounds as we reached the middle. The person in front of me called fatehlal complained of cold now. Baloo's words of comfort did nothing to sooth him as his pants were now drenched in cold water.
The sounds of water was also mixed with the faint sounds of air oozing out of one of the tubes.
Baloo seemed to have realized this long ago (may be even before we started) and was rowing as fast as he could. Now he also was talking fast
"dheeraj rakho bus aa hi gaya hai" (We are almost there)
"bus 100 gaj door hi hai" (Just 100 yards now)
As fate had more such adventures in store for me, we reached the other bank by 7.55 leaving everybody filled up with emotions of mutual congratulations and justified curse for meJ )
Justified indeed it was as one of the tyres was indeed half deflated and baloo's gamble had paid off.